Wednesday, December 18, 2013

Staying Patient

I know many people, especially parents and peers, sometimes have trouble remaining patient with those of us on the spectrum as we learn to navigate the world around us. When we become adults, however, we often have trouble doing the exact same thing with our neurotypical peers - it's just part of the human condition!

As I've chronicled here in brief over the past few months, my grandmother has moved in with us temporarily and she'll be with us until April or so. My dad and my aunt are each taking her for half the year, and we've had her since October. At first, things weren't so bad, but since she's never been the brightest and she doesn't pay attention to us when we explain things to her, it's gotten really frustrating. I've been finding my stress levels increasing more and more and my patience growing shorter and shorter over the past two months, especially since we (my parents and I) haven't had time to take care of our own business since we've all had to look after and help her with hers. We've all been extremely far behind on things, so it's gotten tough and everyone's tempers seem to have gotten shorter along with it.

My own frustration is one thing, but since everyone - including my grandmother, who feels like a burden even though she isn't - has been frustrated too, the extra tension in the house really has been eating at me (because as anyone with Asperger's or anyone who knows someone with Asperger's knows, we're too empathetic and we can't handle other people's emotions very well). It's made my hypothyroidism flare up, too, so I'm constantly tired to boot. It's just been very, very difficult for me both physically and mentally.

I've been doing my very best to learn how to remain patient with my grandmother - living with us full-time is certainly a big adjustment for her, too, and I know it's been very tough on her. It's been very difficult for me to get used to having someone who traditionally has caused many sensory overloads for me around all the time, but it's just as hard for her to be here. I just keep trying to remind myself that she's struggling, too, and that I need to see this from her perspective, but it's definitely hard when having her here has been causing all sorts of sensory problems for me. I suppose I just need to keep on trucking here.

Anyone else have a similar problem? Is there any advice you'd like to share with both me and anyone else reading this? (Thank you in advance!)

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